Home > Uncategorized > I absolutely cannot drink Heineken… vile stuff

I absolutely cannot drink Heineken… vile stuff

I accept that there are people out there who enjoy a good Heiney, but I am not one of them.  The taste is so unlike anything that I would typically call “beer” that it needs to be classified maybe as some other type of drink. 

As a self-admitted beer snob, I often have a tough time finding a beer that I can enjoy at places like a convention center where everything is middle-of-the road very light tasting mass-produced beer.  At a conference a few weeks ago, I made a good attempt to go out drinking with my coworkers but was stifled by the selection of beer at not only the conference hotel but also the restaurant we went to.  The list went something like this:

  • Budweiser (which I usually don’t mind but they must brew it differently in Florida)
  • Bud light
  • Amstel light
  • A couple other really bad options
  • Heineken

After exhausting the options, I decided to pony up and try the only real premium selection they had there: Heineken.  It’s been years since I’ve had one, and the years do change one’s tastes so I figured why not.  Blech!  I’m not one to leave a full beer on the bar, but I simply could not force that skunkwater down my throat.  Yuck!

I heard a story once from a source who I trust (which doesn’t guarantee its authenticity but makes me at least give it some weight) about that trademark skunky taste that Heineken has.  The story goes something like this…

Apparently when Heineken wanted to expand their US offerings to include draught beer, they ran into a backlash from loyal customers.  The beer coming out of the taps did not taste anything like the sweet nectar that spills from the green neck of their favorite dutch beer.  No, instead it tasted like some cheap American knockoff and they would have none of it.  Back at HQ, they were puzzled and it took them a while to figure out that Americans were accustomed to drinking beer that due to the long shipping times and the green bottle had gone bad.  “Lightstruck” is the term that my insider used to describe what happens to beer when it gets too much light (there’s a reason it’s usually shipped in brown bottles) and turns it skunky.  When shipped in a keg, the beer doesn’t receive any light and does not go bad (ahem, I mean to say of course that it doesn’t get that trademark yummy Heineken taste).  If you believe my source, all draught Heineken bound for North America is now passed by a light source to turn it skunky before it is packed in a keg and shipped across the ocean.  Enjoy!

Categories: Uncategorized
  1. Anonymous
    August 24, 2006 at 1:37 pm

    You dare to compare Budweiser to Heineken, you must be a red neck!!!!!!!! Therefore I don’t blame you for your ignorance!

  2. Anonymous
    September 10, 2006 at 1:16 am

    Heineken is good

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